Raqif Makhdoomi
Everyone is excited about Valentine’s Day. Some eagerly wait for it as an excuse to spend time with their loved ones. The day especially excites unmarried young men and women who are in relationships. For married couples, however, it often does not hold the same appeal. While some anticipate celebrating with their partners, others look forward to finally expressing feelings they have long kept hidden.
Yet this practice of romantic expression did not emerge until the fourteenth century, when poets such as Geoffrey Chaucer and others began romanticising the occasion. Before that, nothing particularly romantic was associated with Valentine’s Day. The story itself goes back to the third century.
Valentine’s Day has darker roots in ancient Rome. Some historians link it to the Roman festival of Lupercalia—a pagan fertility ritual involving animal sacrifice and ceremonial rites—though this connection remains debated. In the late fifth century, Pope Gelasius I outlawed the festival and replaced it with St Valentine’s Day, linking the date to the martyrdom of a Christian priest.
According to popular accounts, Emperor Claudius II had banned the marriages of soldiers, believing that unmarried men made better fighters than married ones. During this time, a priest named St Valentine defied the decree by secretly marrying young couples, including soldiers. When the emperor learned of this, Valentine was arrested and eventually executed on 14 February.
From this perspective, the day had little to do with romance. It marked the execution of a man who rebelled against authority in defence of what he believed was right. The notions of candle-lit dinners, long drives, and romantic outings were later additions—customs that grew from medieval traditions rather than ancient history.
The habit of sending handwritten notes and cards, known as “valentines,” began in the fifteenth century. The earliest recorded example is a letter written by the Duke of Orléans to his wife while he was imprisoned. During the Industrial Revolution, mass-produced cards became common—Hallmark popularised them in the early twentieth century—and flowers, chocolates, and other tokens of affection gradually became standard expressions of love on 14 February.
Popular legend adds another layer to the tale. While imprisoned for defying the emperor, Valentine is said to have healed the jailer’s blind daughter and written her a farewell note signed, “From your Valentine,” shortly before his execution—blending themes of faith, sacrifice, and affection.
Seen in this light, Valentine’s Day is rooted in martyrdom and resistance rather than romance. The modern calendar of celebrations—Rose Day, Chocolate Day, Teddy Bear Day, Promise Day, and Propose Day—are recent innovations, shaped by commercial interests and romantic ideals that emerged centuries later.
One may even question the symbolism in present-day customs. Valentine was a man executed for defying royal authority; yet contemporary traditions typically involve men presenting gifts and proposals to women. If anything, following the original narrative literally would reverse those roles—highlighting how far modern practices have drifted from the historical story.
Over time, the occasion has been thoroughly monetised. Shops, cafés, hotels, and gift stores profit enormously, while young couples celebrate—often unaware of the origins of the date. To some critics, this raises an uncomfortable question: who reminds them that the day commemorates a martyr rather than merely a romantic ideal?
Another irony lies in behaviour that contradicts the very notion of love—some people even deceive their partners while claiming to celebrate the occasion. Betrayal disguised as affection hardly seems worthy of the word “love.”
It is therefore worth acknowledging that Valentine’s Day is not quite what popular culture portrays it to be. Its roots lie in ancient Rome, a society marked by rigid laws and frequent brutality. Understanding that past does not necessarily require abandoning present-day customs—but it does invite reflection on how history is reshaped, romanticised, and commercialised over time.
